Category: D/s, Power Play
Subcategory: Power exchange / Protocol

Struggling / Resistance

Struggling/Resistance involves the submissive physically fighting against restraint or control as part of consensual play. Unlike genuine resistance, this is a choreographed element where the submissive actively strains against bonds, wrestles against the dominant's grip, or attempts to avoid capture while actually desiring to be overpowered.

The appeal lies in the primal dynamic of physical power exchange. Submissives often enjoy the visceral experience of testing their strength against restraints or their partner, the heightened sensation that comes from physical exertion, and ultimately the surrender that feels earned rather than given. The physical struggle can intensify the psychological submission that follows. Dominants typically value demonstrating their ability to overcome resistance, the satisfaction of physically asserting control, and the contrast between struggle and eventual submission. This play creates a physical narrative of conquest and surrender that many find deeply satisfying, while requiring clear prior negotiation to distinguish consensual struggle from genuine resistance.



For the purpose of filling the checklist: Giving in this activity signifies the topping: e.g. restraining the other. Receiving signifies the one struggling/resisting

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This is a description of an activity in the BDSM checklist (also known as a 'kink list'). Want to discover what (more) kinks you might have? Maybe share them with a partner? Start the checklist!

About the category D/s, Power Play

Dominance and submission (D/s) and power play revolve around the consensual exchange of control between partners. This dynamic can manifest in countless ways—from bedroom-only scenarios to comprehensive lifestyle arrangements—all centered on one partner taking a controlling role while the other yields authority within negotiated boundaries.

People are drawn to power exchange for diverse reasons: the freedom found in surrender, the thrill of exercising control, the deep trust required, and the opportunity to explore aspects of themselves not expressed in everyday life. Unlike physical BDSM activities which focus on bodily sensations, D/s emphasizes psychological connection and the erotic potential of power differentials, creating experiences that many find deeply fulfilling on both emotional and sexual levels.

About the subcategory Power exchange / Protocol

Power exchange protocols establish formalized patterns of behavior between partners that reinforce and express their D/s dynamic. These may include specific language requirements, postures, rituals, or rules that symbolize and maintain the consensual power differential between participants.

People engage in protocols for the structure and clarity they bring to power exchange relationships. These practices create consistent reminders of roles, deepen the psychological aspects of submission and dominance, and provide a framework for expressing devotion and control. For many practitioners, the mindfulness required to maintain protocols creates a meditative focus that enhances connection and satisfaction beyond what more casual power dynamics might offer.



All activities in the checklist: